Tuesday, February 23, 2016

LOL ...! The Hilarious Life of A Nigerian Medical Student

I saw The Hilarious Life of A Nigerian Medical Student on Z!koko and decided to report.

It's screaming funny!


When I was born, the plan was to be a baby girl for life and literally too. First day I heard… “you suck breast too much, I can’t wait for you to grow up”.

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But you see, life’s not fair, I started walking and people started throwing around words like “responsible”, “house chore” etc.

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School started and everything was smooth until I got to senior secondary class.

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Science class, Art class or Commercial class?


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Decided science class and then my mother decided to tell mummy Biola that always has an opinion about everything. Mummy Biola went..

skibo


And then "this girl likes to talk a lot. She should be a lawyer." 

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Meanwhile, I was like ... 


noooo


So time for JAMB, I studied the brochure. 


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I concluded on Medicine and Surgery. So first year in school, I was ready. New baffs, who this?


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Year 1 was a breeze!


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Year 2, Anatomy lecturer said, "look beside you, that's your competition."


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Big texts, human bones, people started calling me “D Doctorrrrrrr”, I started..


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First test and our scores were pasted on the notice board, when I saw my score..

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Year 2 to year 3 break, went home and dad introduced me as a doctor to his friends, I was like..

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Year 3. Restrategized and was ready.


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I wasn't going to fail anymore because...


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First professional exam. 

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Meanwhile family and friends were very expectant. 

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Results were released and yay I passed!

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Time for ward coat and actually dealing with human beings. 

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Things took a different turn. Each Consultant* had their rules. 


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When you resume in the morning you get to clinic, there are no patients.

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And the Consultant announces an impromptu ward round to keep you busy. 

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Consultant then asked: "Whose patient is this?!" and you have not clerked. 


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But you signed for your clerking* partner in exchange for him to clerk your patient but he still didn’t clerk.

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Consultant starts insulting you and your ancestors and a Registrar* now puts mouth.

move please


After you finish chopping that insult from your Consultant. 

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Then the person that was meant to clerk comes to say sorry to you. 


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When you get to the hospital early the following day to clerk the patient and are feeling quite confident..

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You finish presenting and the Consultant asks if you’ve seen a stupid person before and you reply..

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Then he asked when last you checked the mirror. 

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When you forgot to ask a question from your patient but you lied to your Consultant you did.


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And the consultant now asks the patient to confirm if you really did.

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And the patient answers "No"

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Then he asks the patient “have you seen this medical student before?” And the patient is hesitant.


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Meanwhile your classmates are behind you like 



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After the ward round they come to pay their condolences. 

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But you still believe tomorrow will be better. 

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Exam time and everybody is like ...

prayer


You and your study partner sit in the exam hall like ...

bumper



First question - which of these is not likely to be true?

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How was your paper?

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And the guy that always passes comes to tell you yet again the paper was bad. 


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When your the first person to finish oral exams. 

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Then you start permutating your scores to see if you have up to 50%.

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And finally you passed.

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Then you finally have time to go to those weddings your friends invite you to. 


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But through everything your still a D Doctorrrr. 

Beautiful young doctor standing with hands folded and assistant doctors in background


This is by a Zikoko Writer Dami Odufuwa & Contributor aAdeola Adedeji.
Featured Images By Edu Africa.

*Consultant – A specialist in a particular area and the most senior doctor in a clinical team. *Registrar – A senior doctor in the team studying to become a consultant. *Clerking – Interviewing a patient to determine what is wrong with them.

 SOURCE - Z!KOKO

(c) JuicyChitChats 2016 [Tuesday 23rd February]

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